Archive for January, 2009

Computer Pink Eye gross

Friday, January 30th, 2009

As is custom at CBS on Take Your Kids to Work Day, Sean took Bedient and I to the office today where we drank free coffee-like beverages from the auto-coffee machine and played with some office equipment. Then Sean was called away to make video games for some tv shows (boring) so Adam and I went to the computer fix-it store. My computer screen is fluorescent pink, which makes blogging /internetting/living very difficult. I don’t have a picture of it, so I’ve gone ahead and drawn out a detailed image to give you a clear idea of what I’m working with:

pinkscreen

This image is not an exaggeration. Apparently the tech-man at TekServe thought I was a millionaire. This was understandable since it was take your kids to work day and I wore my banana republic fancy slacks. My incessant hair flipping and flirting also didn’t help and he said the repairs would cost $726. Oh, $726 million dollars? I asked him. He did not find this funny. I politely declined the repairs then punched him in the neck and tried to run away which was difficult because I was wearing heels and had to wait for Adam to get his coat on. Nobody wins.

Chicago For Sale

Thursday, January 29th, 2009

The French Embassy

“I don’t mind gentrification and development — I live in Bucktown — but it has gone out of control.” Investigation: Neighborhoods for Sale, The Chicago Tribune

This makes me so angry I don’t know what to do with myself. Remember this house? Sean? Eve? GrandpaLou? Apparently Chicago developers are buying out local alderman to bypass zoning laws. The consequences are devastating. What are all of the University of Illinois at Chicago Urban Planning graduates doing? Wooing the 2016 Olympic committee with midwestern casual wear, free range beef, and false CTA promises? omg. What if the UIC grads are the developers? Ugh. I was going to read this whole story but I’m far too upset and now it’s too late and I just know I’ll be awake all night trying to soothe myself with Jane Jacobs excerpts.

“A group of clergymen in Chicago, appalled at the fruits of planned city rebuilding there, asked,

Could Job have been thinking of Chicago when he wrote:

Here are men that alter their neighbor’s landmark…
Shoulder the poor aside, conspire to oppress the friendless.

Reap they the field that is none of theirs, strip they the vineyard
wrongfully seized from its owner…

A cry goes up from the city streets, where wounded men lie groaning…”

-The Death and Life of Great American Cities, Jane Jacobs

Email of the Day

Thursday, January 29th, 2009

“i quit arabic [class] because i was feeling too stressed and i feel sort of guilty and like a quitter but i am trying to preserve mental health and not worry about homework and shit.  instead i am trying to go to the gym and watch arrested development more.  so instead of trying to unite america with its arabic-speaking brothers and sisters i am just trying to be thin and laugh a lot. ” anonymous

0-13?

Tuesday, January 27th, 2009

How ‘Benjamin Button’ Can Finish 0-For-13 On Oscar NightDefamer

Email of the Day

Tuesday, January 27th, 2009

Carl Kasell Poke

This is (was?) a Mistake

Monday, January 26th, 2009

Why

The FreetZ was cleaning out her photo drawer and, lucky for us, came across this little memory.

How to Win Boyfriends and Lose Money

Monday, January 26th, 2009

Harrison Ford

After Saturday’s episode when Ralph hurt my hair feelings, I decided it was time to look young again. So, naturally, I bought the cheapest hair dye I could find, and, last night, managed to dye my hair while simultaneously cleaning out the fridge. It should come as no surprise that I have turned into a stay-at-home housewife. Why, just this morning, I was cleaning the dishes in my work-out spandex while asking Fritchey if she still wanted tonight to be Pizza Night. Listen, long story short, mama has no billz, and the cheap hair dye was the dumbest and failed.  See evidence above. I felt like Harrison Ford in The Fugitive, which I guess, was kind of a bonus, but definitely not worth ruining one of my white towels. So now, after a fifteen minute sulk session, I must go buy a second box of hair dye so I can finally win me some Sleepy’s Manager boyfriends. Win?

Let’s Try This Again

Saturday, January 24th, 2009

This week on Platonic Mattress Shopping, Sean decided to spend more money exchanging his new mattress than I have in my bank account.  This is not the point.  The point is we were nervous about confronting Ralph the Sleepy’s Store manager about the exchange since we had spent more than enough time two weeks ago testing out the various options.  This week, we took Ralph’s advice, and laid down on a mattress for fifteen minutes to pretend like we were going to bed for reals.  Everything was going great.  Then, while Sean was off jumping on twin Sealy’s, Ralph looked at me, then at my hairline, smiled, and said, is that a birth mark or are you going grey?

Tune in next time when I have to figure out what to do with two brand new, unreturnable mattress pads!  But really, who needs one two both?

FAFSA

Friday, January 23rd, 2009

I like that word.  Say it.  Fafsa.  Come on over and bring your party hat because we’re having a Fafsa!  Good.  So I was filling out my Fafsa which is some student financial aid type situation and was casually browsing the questions about taxes and income (hahahaha) and past felonies.  Then I came across this one:

Is Student At Risk of Hopelessness?

Omg maybe I don’t know what?  What if I am at risk? Does that mean I can’t get financial aid?  What if I pull myself out of it?  With some good feelings blog posts and discount therapy? Same thing

Then, on a second look, realized it read:  Is Student At Risk of Homelessness?

Mom?

Hollywood Knows Nothing

Thursday, January 22nd, 2009

Oh good, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button was nominated for seventy five Academy Awards.  Happy, Graham? I feel horrible.  Let’s go ahead and watch this video from Funny or Die to help validate our feelings.  Thanks to DDSchim.