Archive for the ‘This Makes Me Happy’ Category

Low Pony Anniversary

Tuesday, September 17th, 2013

Here are some fun facts: July 1st was my 2 year anniversary in San Francisco, July 5th was my 2 year anniversary at work, and August 10th was my 2 year anniversary with Dr. Adam. This is big news I’ll tell you why. My head doctor told me it takes a minimum of 2 years until a place starts to feel like home. And at first I didn’t believe him because I had been in other places that felt like home much sooner than that. The difference was that everything in San Francisco was new: the city, my job, my friends, my gentleman friend. So he told me it would take 2 years and in the meantime I should have friends visit and show them my favorite places and also I should leave the city and then come back. Leave and come back, leave and come back, and every time I came back it would be like coming home. So I did. I went to like 15 east coast weddings. And it worked. Like pavlovian conditioning every time we land in San Francisco Dr. Adam says “We’re home!” and my mouth salivates.

The good news is I still live in San Francisco and I still have my job and also I still have Dr. Adam. Sometimes I get confused and when people ask where I’m from I’m like San Newphillicago! I also got a handful of promotions and am on my third set of business cards which is exciting and now senior staff are sending me to meetings with the big guys where I wear my lady business suits and put my hair in a low pony and give firm hand shakes/eye contact which is sign language for success.

In other news: Did you know that Ma Sweet bought a second Sweechigan house? Baller. It’s the one behind the original Sweechigan house so now we have a compound for parties and frisbee and Thanksgiving family hugs.

Jury Duty if my favorite duty

Friday, January 18th, 2013

Jury Duty is over. It ended on Wednesday. The attorneys gave their closing arguments on Monday morning and then the judge turned to the jury and told us the next step would be the deliberations. I have been waiting for deliberations since Day 1. Think about it. You sit in a courtroom for a week and hear all these alarming facts and stories and all you want to do is gossip with someone. But I was very good and I never talked to anyone on the jury, not even to say hi, which might have been rude but I am a strict rule follower in the courthouse. So you can imagine my disbelief when the judge turned to me and said, And you, Alternate Juror #2, are dismissed. We’ll call you if we need you. What! I don’t get to deliberate? No, the clerk said, only if one of the jurors is excused. In the meantime, please spend tomorrow within 20 minutes of the courthouse in case we call you in.

So I sat at home on Tuesday next to my phone waiting for them to call me. I at least wanted some kind of trial wrap party with the jurors so we could finally introduce ourselves and mingle and drink wine out of solo cups and celebrate our civic duty achievement. Instead, the clerk called me at 4:30pm and said, The trial is over. The defendant was found guilty. And that was it.

I feel like I got kicked out of a movie before it ended and someone at the concession stand calls me over and says: It was the sled.

Still, jury duty was the best thing to happen to me.  Here are my top three reasons why I love jury duty:

  • Number 1. Court was in session everyday from 9:30am-4:30pm with a morning recess, a 90 minute lunch break, and an afternoon recess.  I would go home for lunch and Adam and I would eat tuna fish sandwiches. I felt like I was in kindergarten.
  • Number 2. My commute was 15 minutes long, which means I could get home in time to go to the early session BodyCombat! gym class.
  • Number 3. I got to sit and watch people argue and talk about interesting topics and then I was told to judge them.

Can I be a full-time juror? I think jurors only get paid like $17/day which would be tough in San Francisco, so maybe I’ll just try to make it an annual part-time gig.

Here is a photo I found on the internet that really sums up my experience:

30 in Chicago

Wednesday, October 17th, 2012

So far 30 has been great. Dr. Adam and I went back to Chicago last weekend where Pa Sweet took us out to dinner at his favorite restaurant. Everybody in the restaurant new Pa Sweet and I think he is the new restaurant mayor which was great news because they gave us a complimentary fava bean side dish which had the most delicious fava beans I have ever fava-ed I think because they were braised in butter. Then we drank 5 bottles of wine. It was a great success. Pa Sweet and Dr. Adam spent most of the time explaining science and history facts to me which I pretended to understand but mostly I did not. Then we went with Ma Sweet to her cottage in Sweechigan where we chopped wood and sat around in birthday crowns and drank spiced cider. She is also building a pool in the backyard so we stood around and looked at the hole in the ground.  It was very rustic. Now it is 7:10am and I am back in California and I am on a train going to a mobile home park in Palo Alto where I will be observing nearby intersections in preparation for the mobile home park to be redeveloped into a mid-rise apartment complex. Isn’t this exciting? Me neither. Ok here are photos from Chica-go-go.

Dinner at Vie with Pa Sweet

Thurdeeth Berthday

Wood chopped

Untitled

More here.

CHOO CHOO

Monday, October 1st, 2012

Um. My coworkers printed a poster of this and put it on my office wall. I think I’m going to leave it up for our company’s Open House on Thursday night. If anything, I should put this image on a button and wear it on my commute. It’ll give me Caltrain cred.

Alex-Birthday

Gchat of the Day: Ma Sweet gets an iPhone

Wednesday, July 11th, 2012
Ma Sweet leaving the office in 5  care to chat?
ACSweet sure
Ma Sweet ok.  i’ll tell suri to call you
ACSweet omg tom and katie holmes’ daughter? or siri?
Ma Sweet Tom and Katie’s daughter of course
Ma Sweet oh no… i feel a hobab gchat of the day coming on
ACSweet are you SPYING ON ME!?
Ma Sweet no but siri is

Tahoe sinning and skiing

Monday, February 13th, 2012

Ok I went to the Tahoe this weekend and I did two things: I skiied and I gambled. That’s not true, I skiied and I watched other people gamble. I have never gambled because it’s too risky for my confidence intervals and also my wallet intervals. This was my first time in a casino. It was very exciting. I drank 1 rum and coke while I watched people play black jack for 2 hours. I spent most of the time doing math and counting to 21 but the black jack dealer was faster than me and when he put down a hand in front of my gentleman friend I would go, Oh look a 5 and a 7, that makes, 5, 6, 7, 8, and then suddenly the cards would be gone and someone next to me would be fist pumping and another person would be crying and the dealer would be shrugging and I would still be counting to 11 12 (math is hard). It was exhausting. Then one of our friends lost 200 wallet billz and came up to us and said, Tell me not to take out 200 more dollars to win it back, and just as I said, Don’t take out 200 more dollars to win it back, my gentleman friend said, Take out 200 more dollars to win it back. And so he went and took out 200 more dollars and then won it all back. Plus another $45. Here is our friend and me celebrating with his $245. I am trying to look like I fit in but my eyes hurt from the cigarette smoke and also my gray hair screams: I gambled away all my salon money!

Jing is a millionaire. I have gray hair.

Here are some more photos.

Here is a photo of us on a blue.

It took longer to take this photo than it did to ski down this mountain.

Here is a photo of my gentleman friend on the ski lift. He does ski-eyes-sad-face very well.

Skiing is the most fun

Here is me with a 5 pound bag of chips.

The best part of Tahoe - the snax!

The Switcheys and the Fritchwitts

Sunday, January 8th, 2012

Breaking news: The Fritchwitts are engaged to be mahweed. Ma Petite FreetZ and her doctuh Berkwitt are going to be unionized. I received the news a couple of weeks ago while on the train analyzing Google Campus crash data when I got a text from Ma Petite with a photo of a painting with a ring in it that said, It’s official I’m getting married! I wept and then I fainted.

The Fritchwitts came to visit last week and I spent most of the time holding on to the FreetZ’s arm and petting her ring finger while our Dr. Adams (2!) talked about weddings cells and cancer detection (boring). I don’t have any photos of the four of us on our double dream bicycle date to the ocean and back but here’s a photo of the Switchey’s and the crown the Berkwitt put on the FreetZ’s ring finger. Dreamboat city if you ask me.

The Switchey Reunion

Berkwitt crowned the FreetZ

Baggus, Mercedes, and Ma Sweet

Thursday, December 8th, 2011

Hello this is Alex, know what today is I’ll tell you it’s Ma Sweet’s birthday!  What a catch. For Ma Sweet’s birthday I bought her some baggus because Ma Sweet loves baggus because they are very convenient and fashionable and sometimes draw oohs and aahhs from grocery store clerks, bus drivers, and potential suitors on the streets. That is why I bought her some flashy baggus so she can buy me things and carry the things home in them all while getting a lot of attention and compliments as Ma Sweets tend to do even without the baggus.

In other news at work today our conference room table caught on fire. I’m not sure how it happened but I think it had to do with an electrical outlet so the whole office went to starbucks and I read the new yorker for a while until our office leader said, ok everybody go home! So everybody walked or drove their 5 minute-commute home and I got on the 90 minute local train back to the city of San Franneato. I bought a burrito for 90 minutes of comfort but now that the burrito is over I do not feel comforted and I think it was a mistake.

These days I have been biking the Mercedes to the train-port and bringing the mercedes on the train to San Jose where I bike the mercedes to the office. It’s like bring your pet to work day everyday. And on the train the mercedes gets to ride in the bike car and spoon the other bikes. It’s like a bike play date. I sit in the row above the mercedes and watch it to make sure that nobody hits it or takes it or maybe stares at it too long because thy shall not covet thy trainmate’s bike.

In some similar news I have been going to work everyday which I think is what all adults do which is not very exciting to blog about. There are not a lot of exciting things like staying up until 4am drawing bike lanes or traveling to the Aruba and swimming with flamingos to blog about.  I have my own cubicle at the transportation planning factory and my office leader told me I could get a street sign to put in my office cubicle and he gave me a list of street designations and said, ANY ONE YOU WANT! He did not yell it like that but when I repeated it in my head it sounded like it. I think I am going to get Sweet Street because Alex Annex and ACSweet Boulevard aren’t as good. I will post a photo when it arrives for proof. When I am not going to the transportation planning factory I am boxing or drinking or. No. That’s it. I am boxing or drinking but never at the same time. Sometimes I am also biking on long rides with my gentleman friend. I leave the mercedes at home because it is a sprinter and not a long distance runner and I wear a bicycling outfit that makes my confidence intervals shrink.

And now here is a photo of Ma Sweet’s hiking action shot. Happy Birthday Ma Sweet!

Ma Sweet's action shot

Jab-Jab-Twist (my new favorite drink?)

Tuesday, August 9th, 2011

Today was the most boring day of all days at the Transportation Planning Factory. Know why? Because the island of Hawaii keeps track of every car that turns in every lane on every road and guess who was tasked with building the excel tables? I listened to a lot of Nina Simone Pandora stations building those tables and at one point did a few laps around the San Jose and then finally got on the train to go back to the San Francisco. The good news is at 8pm I had a training session with my personal ballroom dancing trainer which makes me happy because I basically show up every week waiting for him to tango his way into my heart arms or at least onto national television. So I got there early to run some miles on the treadmillcycle and he was proud and then we did some dumb squats or whatever and then he said, ok, ready? And I said, ready. And then he wrapped my hands in official boxing tape and put on my gloves and I punched him for 30 minutes. 5,6,7,8 and jab-jab-twist…jab-jab-twist-duck. Between punches he made me do situps and I felt like Rocky and he made me do a sit up and then punch his hand and in between sit-up-hand-punches I asked if next time we could do half boxing half ballroom dancing and he said, Which dance? The cha-cha, the foxtrot, the merenge, or the jive? And I said all of them? And then he invited me to a gin blossoms concert in santa cruz. I think I’m in love.

He told me to look mean for the photo but I kept giving him sad-eyes-happy-I-think-I’m-in-love-with-you-face which he found confusing and he was like are you sad? And then I punched him in the gut. I feel great.

Yep.

Email of the Day

Tuesday, July 26th, 2011

Hey there,

I was thinking about starting a blog, but I don’t know who to use for hosting it. Is that right? Hosting?

I liked your blog when you had it up. Do you remember who you used for hosting? Was it wordpress? Did you like it? Was it easy? Because I’m not so technically proficient or smart, and my attention span is very, very

Thank you,
Dustin