Archive for the ‘This Makes Me Unhappy’ Category

I hate you regression model homework

Friday, March 25th, 2011

oh no. oh no. omg

Friday, March 4th, 2011

““When I become mayor, you know what I’m going to spend my first year doing?” Mr. Weiner said to Mr. Bloomberg, as tablemates listened. “I’m going to have a bunch of ribbon-cuttings tearing out your [expletive] bike lanes.”

“DEVOTEES refer to her as “J. S. K.” and lionize her as the brave and forward-thinking city planner who ushered in a golden age for bicyclists, pedestrians and environmentalists. Some detractors use a different nickname: “Chaka Khan,” a reference to the big-haired 1970s singer.” For City’s Transportation Chief, Kudos and Criticism, NYTimes

JSK is under attack.

A Tuesday To Do List

Wednesday, February 9th, 2011

Know what today is? No sleeps tuesdays! Ding aling a dingdong. Here’s the drill: Accumulate massive amounts of extra-curricular tasks, jobs, and responsibilities. Take the maximum number of academic credits. Make one of the credits a math class. Remain dedicated to your gym routine. And your head doctor routine. Buy tweed yarn balls from West Elm.

Now, take all of the above and put them together into one week and bingozingoblamo you’ve got nosleepstuesdays!

Here’s what will get done:

1. Job application due tomorrow (priority number one)

2. Read/grade/rank cover letters and CVs for Penn faculty search applicants (priority number two)

3. Write prospectus about transportation research paper that is already one week late (priority-ish)

4. Math homework that will take 30-40 hours and hurt my feelings (priority number one that got demoted four times)

5. Play the Gym/head doctor/husband search round-robin (rescheduled for next year)

6. Go to sleep (rescheduled for Wednesday) UPDATE: Rescheduled for Thursday


Friday, January 21st, 2011

I went to the gym this morning and I needed a handle for a piece of equipment and I couldn’t find it and a muscle man saw me looking for it and he held his hand out like don’t worry, I’ll get this piece of equipment for you young miss! and I was like oh thank you yes I am very meek that’s very thoughtful, and he went to unhook the handle from another piece of equipment but he had trouble unhooking it because he was wearing big muscleman gloves and couldn’t get a good grip and I was like c’mon c’mon I wanna do my tricep pulls!! and then I had to go over and hold the weight down to give him a better angle at unhooking the handle and then he finally got it but when he let go of the hook the weight dropped and yanked my arm with it and I was like OUCH but he had already walked away  so I picked up 1 thousand pounds and dropped it on his foot I win the end.


Monday, January 3rd, 2011

Great news it is 2011 isn’t that great? It is the year of the rabbit and also the masters degrees. Isn’t it great? Everything is so great.

Ok this is a lie everything is not great I feel horrible and have a really terrible case of PSTD syndrome. We had New Year’s Eve extravaganza in Ithaca and yesterday we drove home from Ithaca in the Winnebago and then GC BDoyk slept over and we went on the internet and looked at photos of ourselves and then she left this morning and I was like everything is fine, everything is going to be fine, I am fine. And then I was like  NO I AM NOT FINE and then this song came on my internet head phones and then I burst into tears. Friendship departures have rough landings. Here are some dumb friendship photos.

Ouch repeat

Wednesday, December 1st, 2010

Bad news. I woke up this morning and I thought something didn’t feel right and then I breathed and my throat was like ouch and I was like oh no fml. I’ve spent the day in my studio wrapped in sweatshirts and my Mother Russia hat, shivering. I am drinking tea, soup, honey, and Zicam. Then the hurting throat hurt worse and I called Pa Sweet and I said Pa Sweet my throat hurts and Pa Sweet said gurgle a glass of tepid salt water for 20 second increments so I did and it was just about the most attractive thing I’ve done in years. Now I am going to eat some ibuprofens and hope it clears up the hurting that is now in my ear. Is this interesting to read about? Mom? Can you come over?

In better news: GC Berna has a new blog. I know. Mama so proud.


Monday, October 11th, 2010

Today is Monday also known as Phase One of Post Sweet Trip Depression.

The first phase is often accompanied by post-sweet-trip glow when revisiting the weekend by watching A Weekend at the Cinnamon’s slideshow on the flickr. This is typically watched in public so that other people will see the Weekend at the Cinnamon’s slideshow and stop and ask when you became the happiest most popular person in the world and you laugh and say Shhh i’m watching a slideshow.

Phase two is denial when you start to memorize the Weekend at the Cinnamon’s slideshow on your flickr and become frustrated that a sequel has not yet been posted and then you remember it’s Tuesday and that you’re in your Studio staring at a base map of Aruba and eating skittles out of the vending machine.

Phase Three is total loss of memory and when someone says, Hey how was your trip? you weep because you have sad feelings but can’t remember why.

Phase Four is when someone plans the next friendship reunion and hopefully Peter stops studying for Climate Change Accounting and Wife Shopping 101 to show up for once srsly.


A feelings roller-coaster.

In other news:

For my homework assignment tonight I have to make a map using GIS that illustrates the mid-term county election results based on a single criterion of my choice, like ratio of men to women, blacks to whites, old people to young people, etc.

I’m deciding the election results based on a county’s ratio of people who have married to people who have never married. Because, lets be serious, that’s really what most important in the race of life. I will also make graphs. And maybe post it on HoBaB. And then the internet because the first thing people research in Wife Shopping 101 is ladies who make maps about their dreams right Peter? I feel great.


Saturday, September 18th, 2010

i may or may not have lost my camera.

i don’t want to talk about it.

tomorrow i am going to talk to san nicholas residents about their feelings. I will document this by hand/heart. And then I will weep for my camera.

my heart. it breaks. i cannot even make jokes about food photos. instead i cry and try to sketch my meals by hand with tears and ink.

First the ipod.

Monday, July 5th, 2010

The cat broke my mirror. She climbed up onto the side-table where the mirror is propped and then I heard a noise and then I turned and I saw my full-length mirror falling to the floor where it crashed into terrifying jagged shards. My roommate and her boyfriend ran to help. Are you okay?? They gasped. I sat there crying. How am I going to get dressed in the morning??? They laughed. I wept. Now I will have to stand on top of the toilet in front of the bathroom mirror and jump up and down to see if my shoes match my pants.

Goodbye figure goodbye ipod

Saturday, July 3rd, 2010

Yesterday I went to North Beach to take photos of every single store front in a 3 block radius. It was time consuming. Fortunately it was sunny and I was feeling sunny and I am also making friends and now everybody recognizes me. The salt water taffy lady gave me a free bag of caramel corn which I consumed immdiately. Then I ran into the frozen yogurt man and he said have some frozen yogurt and I said oh no I can’t and he pulled me into his shop and I said ok fine just the kid’s size and he laughed and gave me a large and then I laughed and then cried. And then I walked by the cupcake man and I thought oh no, keep your head down but he was like heeyyy how’s it going? and I was like, Fine thanks (don’t make eye contact). And then he goes here and handed me a box of cupcakes. I need to make friends with the fruit stand man.

The worse news is that as I was riding home on my novelty bicycle my ipod started making funny noises and I went to grab it and it was attached to the magnet in my bag and I stopped in the middle of the road (safety first) and yelled NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

I buried it in the pocket of my bag and today tried to hook it up to itunes today to resurrect it but I could hear the insides and they did not sound like happy tunes they sounded like whimpers. The magnet killed the ipod. The ipod is dead.

Fridays are roughdays.